We’re living in an appearance-saturated society that tells us that our likeability is dependent on being attractive. It’s frustrating and a thousand other things. Thinking that you’ll never be happy because of your looks is the most gut-wrenching thing. The hopelessness and soul-crushing feeling of not looking pretty enough made me want to roll the duvet over my head in the mornings and not come out. I was terrified of social situations and worried that people would look at me in disgust.Įvery single comment could shatter my fragile confidence. I perfected the art of avoiding mirrors and cameras, bought extra clothes to cover my skin, and learned how to keep my head down to avoid eye contact. I felt like a target, a second-class citizen with few rights to have dreams, hopes, or success. My insecurity was like an open wound and my self-esteem was at rock bottom. The borderline shallowness of many people who never bothered to open a book whose cover they didn’t like was painful and grating. Too many times from people’s looks of revulsion or their unkind words. I can’t count how many times I cried over it. I was cursed by a chronic illness that regularly causes rashes all over my body, and sometimes even on my face. Self-loathing and blaming your treacherous genes for giving you an odd face, an imperfect shape, a visible health condition. Pride in your strengths whenever you see someone who looks worse than you. Wrath at whatever higher being there is for not making you one of them. Then you start feeling envy toward beautiful people. Seeing your reflection in the mirror is like a physical pain. ![]() How many invitations have you turned down because you felt disgusted by the way you look?Īnd how many times have you gazed into the bathroom mirror and thought, “Why, in my brief existence on this planet, does it have to be me?” How many times have you hidden away from the world when you felt ashamed by your appearance? The only kind of beauty that endures is the kind that lives in your heart.” ~Lori Deschene
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